Today when I lay down in shavasana my body feels very normal, balanced, supported by the floor. Nothing happens. I notice that the body feels perfectly symmetrical its bone structure. I’m especially aware of the structure of my face. Symmetry. Stillness. Nothing more.
Today when I lay down in shavasana my body feels sucked into the ground and prana moves fast and hard through my body in a swirling vortex movement. It feels like a strong vibration whirling around the body- as if the whole body feels dizzy. Brahma Shakti (energy of creation) whirling through fascia, blood, muscle.
Today when I lay down in shavasana (corpse pose) my navel chakra is warm – like there’s a mini sun shining down on it. This is the place of food and the thinking mind (manas). There is a verse in the Upanishads that says that the most physical part of food is excreted from the body; the subtle part of food is absorbed into the body and the subtlest part is absorbed into the thinking mind. Food nourishes mind.
I am constantly learning from my body. This morning I’ve been listening to some recordings by Dr Christiane Northrup – author of ‘Women’s Bodies Women’s Wisdom’. This got me reflecting on how I have experienced wellness and illness in my life – how my physical body is an expression of the sum total of my emotional states. Over time my body has become increasingly responsive. Nowadays the slightest onset of stress results in tension - a headache perhaps. This means that I am able to catch stress very early on when it is still subtle and easily fixable. I have learnt to listen to and act on my body’s early signals of distress and so bring myself back into full, flourishing wellness immediately. It occurs to me that I do not have a body, my body has me. I am a student of my body and its wisdom.
Today when I lay down in shavasana my eyes are open. My body feels very flat against the ground – like a cartoon figure that has been flattened by a steam roller.
My heart chakra is pulsing and feels swollen on the left side. Prana is pulsing there very strongly. My breath is strong, audible and flowing through my upper lungs. My chest rises and falls.
Then the star that I see through my third eye appears in front of me. Its pale blue-white, and it is faint against the white ceiling. I decide to practice shambhavi mudra – the soft, unfocused gaze where your peripheral vision comes into play. Inner focus, outward gaze. Outer sight and inner sight embracing each other.
I notice that my breath has shifted. It is inaudible and my belly is rising and falling as breath flows through my lower lungs.
Today when I lay down in shavasana my attention was drawn to my crown chakra – specifically to the atom point through which one enters the subtle space. Gently I feel the space above my head expand. My whole body seems to elongate – my feet feel far away. Hovering in this space above the thousand petalled lotus I relish this body – ever new, and full of delightful surprises.
The body is far more fluid and subtle than we usually give it credit for.
Poolside shavasana. Today when I lay down in corpse pose I felt suspended. The sound of the water added to this. The edges of my body softened into fuzz. Strong wave of prana flowed through the flesh of my buttocks into my hip bones which felt pushed forward – like they were yawning and stretching. Fuzzy edges of body. My toes tingled and the soles of my feet felt polished – ‘like alabaster’ was the phrase that came to mind.
When I walked out of the gym a little while later I noticed that my hip bones felt springier and more ‘in place’.
Today when I lay down in corpse pose I felt the right side of my body to be heavier than the left. I noticed that my head was titled to the right and my left leg was turned out so that the outside of the foot almost grazed the floor. It felt like my left shoulder was lower than my right.
I stayed with this weightiness, not attempting to bring my posture into symmetry. Its all too easy to correct the pose rather than listening to its lag/ log/ logic. What has my heavy right side logged in its wisdom? The weight said ‘Wait’. ‘More stillness’. ‘Turn inward even deeper.’
As you read this what has your posture logged in its wisdom? What is its weight telling you?
Today when I lay down in corpse pose I am aware of lots of thoughts, and the sound of a song playing in my head – many Chitta vrittis – (mind waves) are present. Then I become aware of the sound of Om – The ever present pranava reveals itself. I become aware that my attention is in my head area. Then my skirt feels very heavy around my hips. My belly pulls my attention into itself. Head and belly…. two points of play in today’s shavasana. Om, thoughts, belly sensation… body, mind and deeper mind. Layers of self bleeding into and out of each other.